So, Kellen's 18 month appointment was last Friday...which also happened to be my 40th birthday. First of all, let me say...40 sounds SO old to me. 10 years from 50!! WOW. I can't believe I'm THAT old. Time is just FLYING!!!! I was just 20-something a minute ago!! It's really hard for me to put my mind around. It's harder when a lot of your friends are 5-10 years younger than you. This milestone has REALLY been hitting me hard, BUT, I have to say...I have ALL THE THINGS I've dreamed of in life!! OK...I'm not rich beyond belief...but I don't think that really matters. I think, no matter what, what I have is enough because I have Kellen and Patrick. We are basically very comfortable. We need to work on saving more...but I'm praying that after we finally have OUR OWN HOUSE...we can finally start saving for a rainy day. That doesn't seem to make sense as I write it...but I know what I mean.
I think both of us agree that a lot of what we've worked for in our lives has come up to this moment of buying a house. It is our dream and we are REALLY excited. We LOVE the house, the neighborhood, everything about it. I can't wait to make it our own and make it really amazing. I've dreamed of this for YEARS!!!!
OK...back to Kellen. He continues to be awesome!! Kellen, I hope someday you read this. I hope you know how much I (we) love the HECK out of you! No matter what you do or how you act...you are the love of my life. It is SO AWESOME watching you grow up and get smarter and smarter by the day. Your little faces that you make are SO darn cute!! You have this cute thing where if you don't want us to look at you, you'll say "No" and turn your head. SO CUTE!! You have these boards with shapes that you can match up to the holes...and you say "OBAL" for Oval...although sometimes you'll call the Circle an "OBAL". You are learning all your shapes, it's so awesome!! You know the letter "E"! You point at an "E" and say "E!"!!! You are just adding words to your vocabulary like a MADMAN! Unfortunately, you can't say the "C"- "kuh" sound, or "TR" - "truh" or "F" - "fuh". You call fish "BEE!" Not even close, but I totally know what you mean!! When Daddy was getting himself some leftover Chocolate Cream Pie, you were in the kitchen going "DAME! DAME!", which is "Give me" in Spanish! Amazing. Of course all the Hispanic teachers at your school LOVE you and ask you to give them kisses "Dame un beso", so I'm guessing that's where you learned that. You give Daddy and I hugs, which is the BEST. I just pray that I can teach you to be loving to everyone. (except strangers in vans)
Now for the challenging part. Because you are a toddler, you are starting to show me your defiance. This is good and bad. You will hit me (not hard of course) when you don't get your way or I tell you "no". OK...first just let me say...THIS CRACKS ME UP!! Your cute little defiant mad face just cracks me up!! It takes so much restraint NOT to laugh!! But I have to be Mommy and I have to teach you not to hit or be mean. So, I've started putting you in "Time Out" when you hit or do something when I've told you not to. It's just for 2 minutes, and you scream and cry the whole time. But when you're done serving your time, you are usually better. I try to not have to do any of that. I try to redirect you to something else so you won't get mad or defiant. But sometimes, especially when you haven't eaten or it's close to nap or bedtime, you are a HOLY terror! Most of the time it just makes me laugh...you're so cute and awesome no matter what. I'm sure I'll quit laughing when I'm older...so you better shape up now... :)
We just had Father's Day and we had an amazing day with Daddy at the Muehlenbeck Rec Center here in Plano. They have indoor and outdoor pools and water park-like slides--it's a pretty AMAZING set up they have. They have the, what I like to call, Not-So-Lazy-River and you LOVED it! We just went speeding around in circles and you held onto my neck and I could just kiss your precious cheeks a million times. And we splashed and went UP and DOWN in the main pool and you LOVED that too! You would say "UP ADA!"
You are learning how to feed yourself and you don't do too bad of a job! You can get food on a fork and put it in your mouth, but tonight, at dinner, you got a little bored of that and just dumped your plate out onto the highchair tray. Again...made me want to laugh, but I didn't want to encourage that behavior so I had to tell you no. We'll keep working on that...
So...I'm stressing over when you'll be ready to potty train...I don't want to wait too long, but now doesn't seem like a good time with the very likely chance of us moving in a month. So, I think a couple more months we'll wait.
More later as the story develops!!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Why do these things happen in June?
I am kind of in disbelief.
After the past month of sad deaths at work, I have learned of one close to me.
Back in 2003-05, I worked at Palm Beach Gardens Medical Center in South Florida. I became very close to one of the nurses I worked with, Beth. She's a little over 20 years older than me, but she and I had very similar personalities. She was HILARIOUS! She ALWAYS told you what was on her mind...she didn't beat around the bush. I like that in people. I hate when people are fake and you can tell something is pissing them off but they don't tell you, instead they act all moody and you are supposed to guess what is pissing them off...you know...that whole thing. When Beth was happy, she laughed, when she was mad, she told you so. She mostly laughed. And she was an AWESOME nurse. She and I had very similar feelings towards our nursing practice.
We also hung out outside of nursing. When I was dating Adam and he lived with me down in Florida, he would come with me over to her house to help fix things around her condo. Beth and I would also have gatherings with our coworkers. When I left Florida, she took me out for a goodbye dinner. And when she moved to Charlotte, NC soon after...I would drive to Charlotte to see her. We kept in touch via email and would talk on the phone.
Life wasn't easy for her. She had a lot of pain in her knees. She had to take a lot of pain meds. And being a nurse and having to be on your feet A LOT doesn't help. In the recent years, she was able to get a teaching job and was working on her Master's in nursing education. I was really happy about that...she seemed to love her job. Before that, she had such a hard time finding a good job...a good fit for her. She even told me about dates she went on! But I didn't talk to her enough to really know what was going on. When you see someone so sporadically, you only catch up on the big things, and you leave out the "little things" in life that are actually really important in the long run. You also just talk about the good things...you tend to steer away from the bad.
Yesterday, as I walked into the Texas Motor Speedway with Patrick, Carey, and Uncle Paul (we got tickets to see the Indy Car Race, YAY), I was perusing Facebook because I was "checking in" and posting fun pics of us at the race. I happened to see I had a message in my FB inbox. So, I read it, of course...and that's when I found out that Beth had died.
My first thought is how ANGRY I am at myself. Last December, while Patrick and I were in Asheville to visit over Kellen's first birthday, we had intended to go the Charlotte to see Beth. Beth was also supposed to come to Asheville for Kellen's bday party, but she had a work commitment that came up and couldn't come. The trip was so busy...and we just never made it to Charlotte.
Now she's gone. Just like that. I can't email her, I can't call her. I look at her phone number on my phone, and I wonder...what will happen if I just call her? Will I hear her voice?
It's just one more reinforcement of how precious and fleeting life is. I try not to take my friends and family for granted every day, but then something like this happens.
Last night coming home from the race I was thinking. Since my mom died, I feel like I have turned my feelings off. Losing her was the most painful thing. It was the most desperately horrible feeling. It's the WORST PAIN in the world. I'd rather have physical pain over that any day. Now, I feel like I keep myself from getting too emotionally connected to people. Even Patrick to an extent. I just can't imagine having to feel that pain again. Death is so hard to comprehend....how people can have such life one minute and then be gone the next. Where does that "life" go? Heaven? All I can think is...if there IS an afterlife...and I pray there is and it's a good one...IT is so much more than we can even imagine.
My mom used to say she would haunt me. But, I'm not sure if she has. If she has...it's not been like, WOW! "That's my MOM!" Maybe a couple times I've thought...is that my mom trying to tell me something? Then I immediately think I'm a crazy person.
At any rate, there's a memorial service in Santa Fe, New Mexico not this Monday, but the next. I'm off, Patrick's off...and I want to go. It's an 11 hour drive from here.
June is turning out to be a very tough month.
After the past month of sad deaths at work, I have learned of one close to me.
Back in 2003-05, I worked at Palm Beach Gardens Medical Center in South Florida. I became very close to one of the nurses I worked with, Beth. She's a little over 20 years older than me, but she and I had very similar personalities. She was HILARIOUS! She ALWAYS told you what was on her mind...she didn't beat around the bush. I like that in people. I hate when people are fake and you can tell something is pissing them off but they don't tell you, instead they act all moody and you are supposed to guess what is pissing them off...you know...that whole thing. When Beth was happy, she laughed, when she was mad, she told you so. She mostly laughed. And she was an AWESOME nurse. She and I had very similar feelings towards our nursing practice.
We also hung out outside of nursing. When I was dating Adam and he lived with me down in Florida, he would come with me over to her house to help fix things around her condo. Beth and I would also have gatherings with our coworkers. When I left Florida, she took me out for a goodbye dinner. And when she moved to Charlotte, NC soon after...I would drive to Charlotte to see her. We kept in touch via email and would talk on the phone.
Life wasn't easy for her. She had a lot of pain in her knees. She had to take a lot of pain meds. And being a nurse and having to be on your feet A LOT doesn't help. In the recent years, she was able to get a teaching job and was working on her Master's in nursing education. I was really happy about that...she seemed to love her job. Before that, she had such a hard time finding a good job...a good fit for her. She even told me about dates she went on! But I didn't talk to her enough to really know what was going on. When you see someone so sporadically, you only catch up on the big things, and you leave out the "little things" in life that are actually really important in the long run. You also just talk about the good things...you tend to steer away from the bad.
Yesterday, as I walked into the Texas Motor Speedway with Patrick, Carey, and Uncle Paul (we got tickets to see the Indy Car Race, YAY), I was perusing Facebook because I was "checking in" and posting fun pics of us at the race. I happened to see I had a message in my FB inbox. So, I read it, of course...and that's when I found out that Beth had died.
My first thought is how ANGRY I am at myself. Last December, while Patrick and I were in Asheville to visit over Kellen's first birthday, we had intended to go the Charlotte to see Beth. Beth was also supposed to come to Asheville for Kellen's bday party, but she had a work commitment that came up and couldn't come. The trip was so busy...and we just never made it to Charlotte.
Now she's gone. Just like that. I can't email her, I can't call her. I look at her phone number on my phone, and I wonder...what will happen if I just call her? Will I hear her voice?
It's just one more reinforcement of how precious and fleeting life is. I try not to take my friends and family for granted every day, but then something like this happens.
Last night coming home from the race I was thinking. Since my mom died, I feel like I have turned my feelings off. Losing her was the most painful thing. It was the most desperately horrible feeling. It's the WORST PAIN in the world. I'd rather have physical pain over that any day. Now, I feel like I keep myself from getting too emotionally connected to people. Even Patrick to an extent. I just can't imagine having to feel that pain again. Death is so hard to comprehend....how people can have such life one minute and then be gone the next. Where does that "life" go? Heaven? All I can think is...if there IS an afterlife...and I pray there is and it's a good one...IT is so much more than we can even imagine.
My mom used to say she would haunt me. But, I'm not sure if she has. If she has...it's not been like, WOW! "That's my MOM!" Maybe a couple times I've thought...is that my mom trying to tell me something? Then I immediately think I'm a crazy person.
At any rate, there's a memorial service in Santa Fe, New Mexico not this Monday, but the next. I'm off, Patrick's off...and I want to go. It's an 11 hour drive from here.
June is turning out to be a very tough month.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Everyone in the pool!!!
This past week has been really awesome...my cousin, Paul, came home for a visit!! He lives wayyyyy up in Montana with his new wife, Promise and their snorty dog, Elvis. He's an officer in the Air Force...he does very important stuff with nuclear weapons. Or he *thinks* about the possibility of doing stuff with big scary missiles. I'm very proud of how much he's accomplished with the AF and the huge responsibilities they've entrusted him. You know...top secret type stuff!
But I miss the good old loud Paul I know and love...it was SO AWESOME having him around. He still hasn't completely quit smoking...it appears he has a few when he's out at a bar. That really bothers me...especially with all of the death and sickness of young people I've had to witness lately. We are NOT invincible, as much as we'd like to think we are. I don't give him any crap though...he's pretty much quit from what I saw when he was home.
They threw a big wedding reception at my aunt/uncle's house...it was crazy! First of all...it was hot as HELL. Second of all, I was entrusted the duty of making sure pretty candles floated in the pool. I thought I had it all figured out. But, at the start of the evening...the wind was just too much for the candles...they WOULD NOT stay lit no matter what. So, we made more attempts later, and just as the candles were staying lit...my supposedly ingenious method of keeping them floating and not clustered around each other was not really working out. I was becoming quickly frustrated and angry and I just gave up. Promise's fire-loving son never gave up, though. When the sun went down, he and some of the other kids got the candles going and it was pretty for a while.
Until of course...everyone ended up jumping into the pool fully clothed!
Yes, women and men in designer dresses and suits and ties jumped into the pool...turning this wedding reception into the Best. Reception. Ever. !!!
But, remember my last post when I talked about not being happy even though I no reason not to be? Even though the whole situation of everyone jumping into the pool was funny/crazy as hell...I found myself feeling very blah about the whole thing. Seriously...do I not have an ounce of dopamine in my body? Nothing ever makes me giddy! Well...except for the prospect of really good TV on my DVR. Oh...and the most recent win by the Mavs...that was really exciting. Sometimes at work my coworkers make me laugh my ass off. Patrick and Kellen do too. Ah...well. I guess I'm okay. Not everything has to blow me away.
I am kind of excited, but very nervous, about something big.... Today, Patrick and I showed my aunt/uncle the house in our neighborhood that we have been liking/looking at. It's close to where we already live, 4 bedrooms, 2 story, with a pool. BUT, it was built in '81, the pool looks like it needs repair, a LOT of things look like they need repair. But the kitchen is awesome. After showing them, they liked it, but we all came to the conclusion we should keep looking. So, we had our friend/realtor, Adrian, look up some more options for us to look at. Meanwhile, Patrick and I went to lunch. While at lunch, I did some more searching on my iPhone and found a few more houses in the Frisco area. We drove by one, stopped, and it happened to be vacant so we "stalked" it. We walked around it, peered inside, broke into the backyard area, where there was (YAY) a pool! We REALLY liked it. So, I texted Adrian and he met us there.
Long story short, Adrian said we found a GOOD DEAL. So, we are putting an offer in on it!!! It's a lot newer, nothing looks like it needs fixing. It's in move in condition. It's a one-story (what Patrick wants), 3 bedroom, master split from the other two rooms, kitchen overlooks family room and pool area. The master walk in closet even has a cute little window! AND, I have friends from work who live in the exact same neighborhood!!! It's pretty much perfect. Only thing...if it's available and our offer gets accepted...the Michigan trip we are planning for the week after my 40th bday gets postponed till probably August. I think I can deal with that...for a HOUSE!!
Keep ya updated...
Wanna see more pics of the house? Click away!!
But I miss the good old loud Paul I know and love...it was SO AWESOME having him around. He still hasn't completely quit smoking...it appears he has a few when he's out at a bar. That really bothers me...especially with all of the death and sickness of young people I've had to witness lately. We are NOT invincible, as much as we'd like to think we are. I don't give him any crap though...he's pretty much quit from what I saw when he was home.
They threw a big wedding reception at my aunt/uncle's house...it was crazy! First of all...it was hot as HELL. Second of all, I was entrusted the duty of making sure pretty candles floated in the pool. I thought I had it all figured out. But, at the start of the evening...the wind was just too much for the candles...they WOULD NOT stay lit no matter what. So, we made more attempts later, and just as the candles were staying lit...my supposedly ingenious method of keeping them floating and not clustered around each other was not really working out. I was becoming quickly frustrated and angry and I just gave up. Promise's fire-loving son never gave up, though. When the sun went down, he and some of the other kids got the candles going and it was pretty for a while.
Until of course...everyone ended up jumping into the pool fully clothed!
Yes, women and men in designer dresses and suits and ties jumped into the pool...turning this wedding reception into the Best. Reception. Ever. !!!
But, remember my last post when I talked about not being happy even though I no reason not to be? Even though the whole situation of everyone jumping into the pool was funny/crazy as hell...I found myself feeling very blah about the whole thing. Seriously...do I not have an ounce of dopamine in my body? Nothing ever makes me giddy! Well...except for the prospect of really good TV on my DVR. Oh...and the most recent win by the Mavs...that was really exciting. Sometimes at work my coworkers make me laugh my ass off. Patrick and Kellen do too. Ah...well. I guess I'm okay. Not everything has to blow me away.
I am kind of excited, but very nervous, about something big.... Today, Patrick and I showed my aunt/uncle the house in our neighborhood that we have been liking/looking at. It's close to where we already live, 4 bedrooms, 2 story, with a pool. BUT, it was built in '81, the pool looks like it needs repair, a LOT of things look like they need repair. But the kitchen is awesome. After showing them, they liked it, but we all came to the conclusion we should keep looking. So, we had our friend/realtor, Adrian, look up some more options for us to look at. Meanwhile, Patrick and I went to lunch. While at lunch, I did some more searching on my iPhone and found a few more houses in the Frisco area. We drove by one, stopped, and it happened to be vacant so we "stalked" it. We walked around it, peered inside, broke into the backyard area, where there was (YAY) a pool! We REALLY liked it. So, I texted Adrian and he met us there.
Long story short, Adrian said we found a GOOD DEAL. So, we are putting an offer in on it!!! It's a lot newer, nothing looks like it needs fixing. It's in move in condition. It's a one-story (what Patrick wants), 3 bedroom, master split from the other two rooms, kitchen overlooks family room and pool area. The master walk in closet even has a cute little window! AND, I have friends from work who live in the exact same neighborhood!!! It's pretty much perfect. Only thing...if it's available and our offer gets accepted...the Michigan trip we are planning for the week after my 40th bday gets postponed till probably August. I think I can deal with that...for a HOUSE!!
Nothing like a cool cerveza by your own pool, right????
Wanna see more pics of the house? Click away!!
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